What Makes a Good Man?

For one of my eighth grade daughters who recently wrote that her dad is the greatest influencer in her life, nothing was said about how much money he makes or the kind of vehicle he drives.

Instead she listed qualities such as his strong work ethic – the fact he gives 110% to everything he does. It was the strong Christian faith he professes and models. The fact that he has always encouraged and supported everything she does.

For my daughter it is the fact that her dad SHOWS UP. STANDS UP and SPEAKS UP.

Ironically that is also the campaign slogan for 100 Good Men that Radiant Health is using to raise money to empower the lives of victims of domestic violence and their children. It is important to remember that though most violence is committed by men, the majority of men are not violent.

It is important to remember that though most violence is committed by men, the majority of men are not violent.

Yet, unless men are willing to SHOW UP, STAND UP and SPEAK UP, the men who continue to perpetrate the violence will continue to overshadow the good men in our community, state and nation.

The Search Institute refers to Urie Bronfenbrenner who has looked extensively at young people who persevere and grow up healthy in spite of significant stress and difficulty. He has noted that such resilient youth have at least one adult who cares deeply for them. He describes this caring as ―irrational love and adds that youth who have many such adults in their lives are luckier still.

If we are to make a difference in our community and in the lives of our children we must SHOW UP. That means, if you have a son or a daughter, whenever possible be there for your child’s activities and events. If you don’t have a child of your own, mentor a child and attend their activities. Or even simpler yet, take the opportunity to say hello to a child when you see them in your neighborhood or in a public place. And when appropriate, get to know the name of that child and call them by name when you see them.

We must STAND UP for what we believe in and be bold about it. If we are going to change the culture of this community and the negative reports that seem to be abounding about our demise, our poverty and our low educated workforce, it has to begin with us standing up and saying, we can change the culture and it will start with me.

. . . we must be INTENTIONAL in everything we do.

We must SPEAK UP when we hear a comment that is less than positive or that tears down another individual and instead build that individual up.

And, I think most importantly, we must be INTENTIONAL in everything we do.

If we are truly ready to turn things around locally, then we must band together and truly work on improving the lives of our children by empowering them with small, intentional acts of kindness. And for those who want to show that special man in your life that you have noticed he has SHOWED UP, SPOKE UP and STOOD UP – honor him or remember him with a $100 donation to Hands of Hope, a division of Radiant Health.