Shifting Focus

And it seems the media choose to hang onto and chew the “beef jerky” of negative information.  It’s frustrating and demoralizing if we choose to participate by absorbing it as our truth.

I’ve chosen to be more selective about what I allow to enter my mind and how it enters.  As each negative statistic enters my life through email, social media, television and radio, I’ve chosen to tell myself the antithesis.  For example, 33% of the homes in Grant Co. are fatherless homes.  That is a reality.  That also means there are another 67% of homes that are not fatherless.

So, if the majority of our homes have fathers who Stand UP, Speak UP, and Show UP in the lives of their families, work and communities, the following  are true about a father’s positive involvement with his children:

• Protects at-risk children from failing or dropping out of school.
• Decreases boys’ problem behaviors (especially boys with more challenging temperaments) and increases girls’ mental health.
• Produces children who experience more success in their careers.
• Protects against risk factors that pose harm for children (such as problematic behavior, maternal depression and family economic hardship).
• Promotes children’s social and language skills.
• Lower rates of child problem behaviors, including hyperactivity.
• Reduces teen violence, delinquency, and other problems with the law.
• Increases positive child characteristics such as empathy, self-esteem, self-control, feelings of ability to achieve, psychological well-being, social competence, life skills, and less sex-stereotyped beliefs.
• Results in high life satisfaction and self-esteem into adulthood.

I was lucky enough to have a loving and supportive father.  Was he perfect?  No.  He worked hard to support our family.  He loved me the best way he knew how.  And he set a powerful positive example.  I choose to honor his example as I think about family and community.  I choose to catch fathers doing the RIGHT thing instead of focusing on their failings.  And I believe that by shifting our focus as community members, our families will become stronger…one Good Man at a time.

This week I challenge you to recognize the Good Man in your life.  He may not be your father.  Maybe it’s the boss who has mentored you to grow in ways you never imagined and who has provided opportunities.  Maybe it’s a neighbor or a pastor or a police officer.  Tell him how much you appreciate him being a Good Man in your life.

You can do that by nominating a Good Man to our 100 Good Men Campaign.  For more information, go to: www.famservices.com/100gm.

Together, let’s shift our focus.