Live long enough, or watch almost any romantic comedy, and at some point you will likely hear the phrase “love is blind.” In many ways, it’s true! Love learns to overlook a multitude of quirks, …
3 Ways Love Is Not Blind
Oftentimes, a healthy relationship means ignoring those silly things about each other that drive you crazy, like nail-biting or leaving socks on the floor.
However, as we continue to discuss the topic of dating violence awareness this month, it’s important to recognize that love isn’t always blind. Here are three reasons why:
1. Love sees the signs. There are a number of resources for recognizing the signs of abuse, but navigating these waters can still be tricky in real life. It isn’t always as obvious as bruising or black eyes; sometimes it’s hard to see from the outside. Break the Cycle mentions things like social isolation, control over e-mail and social media, and extreme insecurity as warning signs of emotional abuse. Abusive behavior comes in many forms, and love cares enough to notice it.
2. Love doesn’t turn a blind eye. Abusive, controlling, or manipulative behavior is never acceptable, and should not go ignored. Of course, it is easy not to speak up when the one doing the abusing is someone you care about. It is easy for an outsider to assign blame to a victim of abuse, and question why they don’t “just leave.” However, covering for an abuser and blaming a victim is not an act of love. There are many reasons why people remain in abusive situations, and lack of support or belief from friends and family should never be one of them.
3. Love looks to the future. In addition to seeing the signs and being aware of abuse, love looks for ways to actively serve. For some, this may mean taking responsibility for your own abusive behavior. For others, this looks like being supportive of a friend. If you know someone who may be in an abusive relationship, this is one of the most important things you can do to love them. It’s crucial to know how to be an effective advocate. And of course, there are several other ways to get involved in the long-term and help put an end to abuse altogether.
Real love can sometimes mean dirty socks on the floor, or hair clogging up the shower drain. Love looks beyond those things, and sees deeply into a person’s heart. But when it comes to recognizing and fighting relationship abuse, true love is not blind.
